posted: Nov. 11, 2021.
Welcome to my newsletter! I’m trying something new as an addition to my regular live sessions. My commitment to my clients is to promise to be always evolving and changing with what is going on. Not in the chameleon, latch on to whatever fits the trend, kinda way. But in the “how do I continue to fight the mental health stigma, get clinically accurate information out to as many people as possible, and do it in a way that is authentic to my nature” kind of way.
So welcome to my pilot newsletter! In here my hope is to cover some themes that I am noticing across the board in my sessions. I find myself repeating the same feedback and sending the same resources across clients. So why not have one central place where I get to share some great insights with everyone? Of course, if we spoke about something individually that I’m supposed to send you and I forgot, I still encourage you to remind me to follow up :).
For the grammar and syntax sticklers out there, please ignore my grammatical mistakes. I want to focus on content, and the best way I know how is to freely associate, and that does not always agree with grammar. So my apologies in advance!
Theme of the Week- Authenticity
You’ve heard it…authenticity, being genuine, showing up as yourself, but what does that mean? And how does one go about doing that?
As Brene Brown quotes: “Authenticity is a daily practice. Choosing authenticity means cultivating the courage to be emotionally honest, to set boundaries, and to allow ourselves to be vulnerable; exercising the compassion that comes from knowing that we are all made of strength and struggle and connected to each other through a loving and resilient human spirit; nurturing the connection and sense of belonging that can only happen if we let go of what we are supposed to be and embrace who we are. Authenticity demands whole-hearted living and loving- even when it’s hard, even when we’re wrestling with the shame and fear of not being good enough, and especially when the joy is so intense that we’re afraid to let ourselves feel it. Mindfully practicing authenticity during our most soul-searching struggles is how we invite grace, joy, and gratitude into our lives.”
Let’s sit with the one part for a moment, “letting go of what we are supposed to be and embracing who we are.” How often are you putting your words and actions through a filter around others? Thinking first, “is this okay to say? Will it land well with the people I’m around? Will I get laughed at? I shouldn’t do that, that’s silly. No one will understand me if I say this.” I’m sure you’ve probably said these filter thoughts to yourself at some point and can think of many others that I haven’t mentioned.
So it goes back to that cliched quote, “sing as if no one is listening, dance as if no one is watching, and love like there is no tomorrow.” We need to be brave and fight through the fear of rejection and not fitting in to show our genuine selves and figure out who can truly see us and love us for who we are. That is true belonging; knowing that we can show up without filter, free spirited, and know our audience is drumming along to our beat as well and loving us all the more for it.
Challenge this week: Notice Your Filters
I want you to go about your week just noticing times when you filter your words and behaviors before you act upon them. What are those filter thoughts? Are the filters showing up with certain people? Are there people where you don’t notice any filtering?
For the situations and people you notice that you put up filters around, let’s discuss that more in our sessions about what that means for you. It may be a connection that is blocked by fear, or maybe a connection that is not quite the right fit. And for those that don’t come with any filters, embrace and cherish those moments because that is where you find your authenticity. Keep those people around and keep that energy going!